Side of a bullet
by xJace
Summary: That was years ago, Matt!" Would you risk to break a promise, you gave to B?" Silence. It was the only answer he needed. Of course not. Nobody would break his word with BB. / MattxMello BxL


Here is my first fanfiction I translated into English. It may not be perfect but I hope there are not too many mistakes. If you find some - what you most likely will ^^ - please tell me, so that I can fix them and become better. The style may not be the best either but you can read and let me know what you think :) Thanks and have fun!

_**L**_

The scratching sound echoed in the empty room. Well, nearly empty. On the floor underneath the window sat a young man, leaning at the cold wall. The light which fell through the dirty glass, was floating over his red hair, let it shine in the darkness of the room. An almost beautiful contrast.

In his hands he held a small, metallic object he cut with a knife, again and again. More than just carefully. After all, the font had to be legibly despite the small size. And even if he looked like he was fully concentrating on his work, his mind was far away.

„_Beyond ... stop it! Hush!"__Normally, the thirteen-year-old gamer had not gave a damn about the whispered words. He'd just kept going, focused on his PSP. But this voice ... it sounded too familiar. He stopped, uncertain what to do. He turned the sound of the device in his hands off, so he could listen.  
"Оh Lawli ... I thought you'd love to hear my voice!"__No doubt, this husky murmur could only be BB's. But that other person couldn't really ... His curiosity awoke. He hold his breath and sneaked to the corner. The two were in the other corridor so maybe he could lay his eyes on them without being seen himself. But that was risky as well. The image of getting caught flashed in front of his eyes and let him hesistate a moment. He had never done anything like that before. Never.  
But somehow this situation had manged to catch his attention. And that just had to mean something.__  
Far more confident, he moved closer to the corner, careful not to make a sound. In the nightly silence of the orphanage, you could hear a pin drop. But it showed, that the boy had not to look into the corridor: the reflection in the window showed everything he wanted to know.__Two men, about the same size, both with raven-hued hair, plane shirts, pale blue jeans. L and BB. One was pushed against the wall by the other. And it seemed like they were really busy with kissing each other. The redhead opened his eyes with shock and pressed his fingers onto his lips. Impossible ... and just as he was about to sneak away again ...  
"You'll never leave or betray me. Promise me!" "I promise."_

_**L**_

Involuntarily the figure in the cold room bit down on it's back teeth. Those memories. Would he just kept going that night, would he just have ignored the voices. Nothing of all that had happened, hadn't he listen. It had been the first time. The last time. And now something like that had came out!  
No one could have suspect it. This incident happened so many years ago, but it had so serious aftereffects. In the past, in the present. And the aftereffects would go on in the future. He would take care of that.

_Thoughtfully the hacker watched Mello lean back.  
__"You're serious?" The words were muffled by the piece of chocolate between the thin lips. Of course. The blonde had never been able to stay away from chocolate. Not in the orphanage and not now. He had missed the soft crack when the elder broke a piece with his teeth...  
"Sure. Just because I've never mentioned it, it doesn't have to mean it didn't happen." The redhead made himself comfortable on the leather sofa. It seemed like he would stay a while. "I'm not sure if I understood you correctly. L had a relationship with BB?" "Еxactly. And I'm sure he still does." The blond took the chocolate between his lips again. Bit off. "And the reason you think so is...?"__"He promised it. L promised B never to leave or betray him."  
He could still hear that husky voice in his ears that brought L to promise such a thing. L would have never promised it, if he had been in his right mind at that moment. He never broke his promises. But it was impossible to keep such a promise. If L had thought about it a second, his answer would have been different. And that was in turn dangerous. BB could take L out of his mind. And someone, who had such an effect on the detective, just had to have a strong bond to him.__"That was years ago, Matt!" "Would you risk to break a promise, you gave to B?" Silence. It was the only answer he needed. Of course not. Nobody would break his word with BB. "So L would never send B to his doom. Even if he had proof." The redhead had come to the same conclusion as soon as he had heard about the situation. That mysterious murders in Los Angeles and Ls decision to involve himself. Yes, the murderer had to be BB. And L would never catch him, if his feelings for the other were still the same. And even if they were not, there was still that promise.  
"So we will take on the case?" The friends were already sure what to do next. This question was just camouflage, pretending they needed to ask, before acting. Why? Maybe because it was scary to still be able to communicate without words, after all the years. The blonde nodded determinedly and put down the rest of his chocolate.  
"We will take on the case."_

_**A**_

His feet had become numb long ago of the chill and the loss of movement. But he did not care. Everything that really mattered, were those memories. Each like a slap on the face, waking him up more and more. Another mistake. He could have prevended everything by just acting different in that situation. He never should have told Mello anything about L and BB.  
It would have been so much easier. And maybe the story would have had a happy ending. It was his fault. All his fault.

„_That damn brat!"  
The angry yell echoed in the living room, just like the clink of Mello's coffee cup which had been shattered into a thousand pieces by it's owner. The dark liquid floated over the parquet while the blond grabbed other objects, tossing them onto the floor as well or dashing against the wall.  
However, the hacker sat on the same leather couch as a few weeks ago at their reunion, sipping his coffee, looking silently, nearly __apathetic,_ _at his partner. The elder had often fits of rage, it was nothing unusual. Besides, he had never liked this vase the blond grabbed now.  
But as Mello was just about to break the frame from the shelf, he decided to interfere. He stood up, passed the room on his way to the other ignored the crunching under his boots and took the thin wrist gently in his hand.  
"Put it back. There's no sense in tearing apart your whole apartment." He did not have to focus on keeping his voice low. He was still cool as ever. But he spoke the truth, it just did not make sense. This apartment was too pretty to die such a soon death.  
"Releasing stress", was the growled answer. But Mello was everything but stupid and understood his partner. Sometimes he just had to be remembered. Unresisting he put the frame back on the shelf. A moment they stood there silently, looking at the old drawing from Wammy's, the orphanage which raised them both. Even Mello had let himself down to smile, even though he was standing next to Near who was, by the way, the cause for Mello's fit of rage and surely that fact had not made him very happy. The hacker had not believed his eyes as he had seen the drawing for the first time. Right Mello, who ran away from the orphanage at just fifteen years and seemed to hate that place while he lived there, put a picture from it on his shelf?  
"Good boy, Mello", the redhead murmured and placed a soft kiss on the blond's lips. "Now let's think about the advantage of Near investigating in that case as well."_

_**W**_

The grimmed features of the man relaxed as he thought of the time at his friend's house. It had been really harmonic, except the enrages of the elder. Yes, Mello had been the elder but he would always think of him as his younger friend. But that had another reason as the age.  
He interrupted his work on the item as it came clear, which memory would expect him now.

_The scent of fresh brewed coffee hang in the air, mixed up with an obvious but not unpleasant odor of sweat and a hint of chocolate. The redhead still could not believe what they were doing right now, that it eventually should be!  
He had yearnded the beautiful body of the angel for so long, had remembered himself over and over again, that Mello needed more time. And now the blonde had seduced him. On the kitchen table! "P__lease, Matt...The whispered words emphasized with that challenging but submissive look, how he leaned back on the tabletop, and shamelessly showed his pristine body... it was too much to bear. The hacker wanted it, wanted him, and surely did not want to wait any longer. Could not wait any longer.  
"M__att..." The blond should whisper his name one last time before screaming it for the rest of the night._

_**L**_

The pictures of his blond angel were so real that he stopped his work another time to give into the illusion. For a moment he was tempted just to let go, to forget the present and to live in the past. Even if it would set the seal on his death at the end.  
But the thought was as inviting as abhorrent. He had to finish the plan, he had worked out. Currently, this was his only aim. After achieving, maybe he could lose himself in his memories again.

_The hacker sat up, slowly, and looked around the room. The sun seemed to stand high already, a few rays fell through the thin curtains. As he woke up more and more, he began to remember what had happened last night and smiled. After all that time, Mello had let it happen, even begun by himself.  
It had been incredible. As long as he could think, he had wanted the elder. Of course, as a child in a completely different way than now, but his whole life he had had the wish to own him. To have Mello just for himself. And to have got to his goal now was an indescribable feeling.  
They had done it, both for the first time. Had saved themselves for the other. Through all the years they had been separated, they had waited for each other nevertheless. Just because it was only natural. Only natural that they had been made for each other. Already back in the days in Wammy's House they could not have been separated and in the past night they had proofed it ultimately: They belonged together.  
The blonde did not lay next to him anymore, but that did not bother him, most likely, he would already be working. Or so he thought. But as the redhead could not find his friend in the living room, sitting in front of his laptop as usual, he began to worry and searched him everywhere in the apartment.  
But the only thing he found was a hurried written note on the kitchen table where they had made love hours ago. __  
"B __is actually there, where we supposed him to be. I'll go and arrest him before Near does" For a few minutes, the hacker only stood there, unable to move. Mello could not have driven to B's hideout all by himself, right? Right? He could not have done something thoughtless like that! Just a second later he moved again, jumped within moments into his clothes, grabbed his gun and left the place. _

_**I**_

The young man could still perfectly remember the feeling, with which he had left the house. Could still feel the weapon lie heavy in his hand. He swallowed shortly, just like he had done when he had gotten into the car.  
He still had the way in mind which he had driven. Knew, which traffic light had been green and which red. Not, that he had cared about the red ones. And it was not the first time, he remembered that situation. Every night, he saw himself leaving the house with heavy, resolute steps, leaving the door open, turning on the engine, driving down the roads with breakneck speed. Each night the pictures were blurred and slowed down more.  
Each night, they seemed to become more unreal. But that did not change the fact, that everything had happened exactly that way.

_As he walked in, his steps echoed loudly from the walls of the empty depot. Unsure, he looked around, his grip tight around the gun, ready to shoot at any time. But that was not necessary, nothing moved. Nowhere was even a sign that someone had been here.  
But then he saw the collapsed figure at the end of the hall. And he began running.  
"M__ello!" His voice broke. His call was sent back to him from the walls and let him feel like he was shouting the name several times. Or maybe he did, but he did not care at that moment. Everything he cared about, everything that got to him, was that impossible posture Mello was lying in and the blood. Oh god, the blood.  
While still running, the hacker felt a sudden nausea and had to fight back the urge to throw up right now. That did not happen. No, he had to imagine something. That had to be an optical illusion or something. A single human could not loose this much blood! His lungs seemed to be on fire as he let himself drop next to Mello onto the floor, but it still did not reach him. By the way he noted Mello's gun, lying beside him, an empty bullet chasing not far away. This had battered him like that. What a single bullet could cause...  
"M__ello!" This time his yell was much lower as he carefully pulled his lover's head onto his lap.  
"M__att ... are you...?" The words were just a breath, but it was the breath of life. "M__ello ... Mello stay calm! I'll take you to a hospital and everything will be alright!" The redhead had not noticed that tears were running down his cheeks. He only realized, as the first dripped onto the temple of the dying angel in his arms. Yes, his angel was dying and he knew that. It was ineluctable, every help would come too late. He could not even see the bullet hole beneath all of this blood! But maybe he could fool him, fool them both. Even just for a few minutes.  
"Y__our wounds will heal and then we'll find Beyond and punish him for this! And then we'll blow this town! Do you hear me, Mello? We're gonna blow this fuckin town, just leave. What do you think of Australia? You wanted to go there since ... ever!"  
His voice was gone, drowned by the tears which were now taking his sight on the golden framed face of his angel. It was the only part of the elder's body that was not stained with this horribly red blood. "M__att..." "D__on't say anyting ... don't!" He craved for hearing his voice, his wonderful voice. But he also knew, that it caused Mello pain to speak.  
"I__'m afraid ... you have to ... punish ... Beyond ... by yourself ... Mail."  
Hurried the redhead wiped away his tears and wanted to answer something, but it was too late. The ice blue eyes fell shut and his world broke apart. _

_**E**_

Again the hacker felt tears brimming in his eyes. There was no sense in holding them back.  
And so he let them spill over, run down his cheeks and finally drip onto his busy hands. The sudden heat felt odd on his cold skin, refreshing but tiring at the same time. The headache, which had grown familiar to him within the past few days, came back. But the dull throbbing could not keep him off finishing his work.  
He had to punish Beyond for what he had did to him. He had taken away the only person, the redhead had ever liked. The only person, he had ever loved. The only person, he would ever love. It was just equitably to pay him back in kind. And why not with a bullet from the same gun, that had killed Mello?  
He had not yet figured out why the blond had been killed by his own weapon. But in the end, that did not really matter. All that mattered was, that he was gone. Forever. Beyond should get to know this feeling, this emptiness, this hopelessness. Yes, Mail Jeevas would induce L Lawliets death. With a bullet from the same gun, that had taken his angel away from him. He just had to send the bullet he was working on right now to a specific person.  
Kira would arrange that Beyond Birthday lost the person that meant most to him.

And with a dogged mien, he scratched the last letter into the metal of the bullet:

_**T **_


End file.
